15 Funny Parents Whose Humor Is So Elite, They Immediately Went Viral
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“I Never Ate Her Food After That”: 21 People Who Decided To Openly Confess Their Most Disgusting Habits
Redditor u/Ok_Distribution2345 asked, “What is the grossest thing someone has openly told you that they do regularly?” Thousands of people shared the most disgusting confessions they’ve ever heard. Without further ado, here are 21 of their shocking stories. If anyone has ever made a gross confession to you, tell us about it using this anonymous form! If you have a story to share, please send it to CNN iReport. We’ll feature the best in the next few days. Back to Mail Online home.Back to the page you came from. Back To the pageYou came from, we hope you’ll enjoy the rest of the story. We hope to hear from you in the coming days. We’re looking forward to hearing from you! We hope you will share your stories, too! We’d love to hear about your stories. We’d like to know if you have any stories to share with the world. Please email us at tips@dailymail.co.uk or tweet us at @dailymailonline.
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That’s why when Redditor u/Ok_Distribution2345 asked, “What is the grossest thing someone has openly told you that they do regularly?” Thousands of people shared the most disgusting confessions they’ve ever heard, and I honestly have no words. Without further ado, here are 21 of their shocking stories:
If anyone has ever made a gross confession to you, tell us about it using this anonymous form!
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1.”A client recently told me that she literally sits on her hands in public restrooms because she doesn’t want her butt to touch the seat — it may have partially broken my brain.”
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“Yes, you wash your hands, but touching the toilet seat is still wild to me. This topic came up because she was telling me how difficult it was to get off the toilet…maybe because she is SITTING on her hands.
I think about it every time I use the work restroom now.”
—u/chchchcheetah
2.”As an example of a ‘fun fact,’ my boss shared with everyone that she makes her bed every day, but only washes her sheets once or twice a year.”
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“It was not ‘fun.’ I think she realized she made a mistake when she heard everyone react.
Later, some of us tried to follow up on this confession and found out she never changed her habits.”
—u/SunnyOnTheFarm
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3.”An intern at my work said she has never washed her feet in the shower because she just assumed the soap running down took care of it. She defended herself pretty hard.”
“The next day, she came back and said she had asked her family during dinner if people are supposed to wash their feet, and they all looked at her in horror.”
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—u/Thinks_22_Much
4.”I knew a guy in the army who would go to the store, buy cheap women’s thongs, and wear them during morning PT/gym. He even told me he would go number two and not wipe just to get them even dirtier.”
Courtesy Everett Collection / ©Miramax/courtesy Everett / Everett Collection
“Then he would pose as a woman online, and men would pay him anywhere from $50 to $500 a pair. These men were smelling a man’s sweaty butt, thinking it was a lady.”
—u/FutureCorpse__
5.”A woman once told me that when she found an old bag of breastmilk in the back of her freezer (she had stopped pumping almost three years prior), that she didn’t want it to go to waste, so she just tossed it into the brownie mix she was making for her family.”
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“Needless to say, I never ate food she made after that.”
—u/Double-Most6775
6.”I worked with a guy who had dentures. He would eat Oreos, and when he finished, he would take out his false teeth and lick them to get all of the cream filling and chocolate off.”
—u/Jackdaw1947
7.”About two decades ago, my now-ex told me that when he started in the military, there was a woman in his basic training they referred to as ‘Bixby.’ She would use the business end of an unfolded paper clip to dig the pimples on her face. She would do this openly, surrounded by the rest of her unit, and often during meetings when nobody could escape. She would proceed to eat what she scraped off.”
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“Apparently, she was a great soldier, so the way her superior got her to stop was to stop speaking and stare at her, as well as encourage everyone else to do the same.
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This had zero effect on getting her to stop.”
—u/Equivalent_War_415
Related: 17 Signs From The Past Week That Made Me Laugh So Hard, I Spit Out The Water I Just So Happened To Be Drinking
8.”When I was in college, somebody I knew admitted (well, casually stated, but it felt like admitting a crime to me) that they liked to chew up potato chips, spit them into a bowl, and eat them with a spoon.”
“It was something they did as a kid and never stopped. And yes, they did it in front of me. I was horrified.”
—u/Mudslingshot
9.”About three years into our relationship, an (now) ex-girlfriend admitted that she regularly pooped in the shower, then waffle-stomped it down the drain.”
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“I never gave her a foot rub after that confession.”
—u/SeaTie
10.”I once worked with a middle-aged man who told me in confidence that he didn’t wash his dishes. Instead, he let his dog lick them clean because ‘a dog’s mouth is cleaner than a human’s mouth.’ Then he would just wipe them dry and put them away.”
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“He admitted to serving family and guests food/drinks with the same dishes without telling them.”
—u/Lovely_Demon28
11.”A guy once told me that he drank from his ‘proper fountain,’ [he drank his own pee] because ‘there is a scripture about it in the Bible.'”
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“He thought that his body would give him what he needed. No, dude, it’s bodily waste.”
—u/poser8
Related: 42 Wildly Entitled People Who Thought The World Revolved Around Them
12.”My roommate openly admitted that her (now) ex-boyfriend would pick his nose and then wipe the boogers on a specific wall in his room. He had been doing this for years prior to them dating, so the coverage on the wall was pretty significant.”
“I wish I could say this is what caused them to break up, but it was not…”
—u/Obvious-Cycle9602
13.”I worked with a guy in his mid-twenties who had a room at his parents’ house. He said his mom was always nagging him to clean his room because the smell was leaking into the hallway.”
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“I told him, ‘Just clean the room. How bad could it be?’ He proceeded to tell me about the pee-filled jugs he had collected. Apparently, he would get high on edibles and become too paranoid to leave his room, so he used the jugs instead.
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I asked, ‘Are they at least capped?’ They were not.
This same guy also told me about his ‘fingernail and toenail table’ that needed to be vacuumed off because there was no more room left on it.”
—u/GroundbreakingYear69
14.”I had a former friend who liked to get his nails really nasty, especially underneath, and suck on them. I found out about it when we were at a movie, and he began sucking and chewing on his nails.”
“When I asked him why he was doing it, he explained his ‘habit’ with glee. I started gagging and left the movie early.
I haven’t talked to the guy since.”
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—u/BookGnomeNoelle
15.”When I was a kid, my friend and I went to the bathroom on a school trip. While I was washing my hands, she told me, ‘Oh, I don’t believe in doing that.’ About five minutes later, she offered me some chips and was surprised when I refused them.”
“This happened well over a decade ago, and it still lives rent-free in my head.”
—u/nonconformistnuggets
16.”I once had a coworker who had terrible allergies and was always sneezing. He constantly blew his nose into the same white handkerchief…”
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“When it got soaked with snot, he conveniently hung it on the front of his whirring desk fan to dry so he could reuse it.
I wanted to vomit whenever I saw it flapping around.”
—u/PrincessPharaoh1960
17.”I briefly dated a guy who thought he never needed to wash his bath towels because he was clean when he got out of the shower. I discovered this after showering at his place because when I asked for a towel, he said he only had the one.”
“I thought, ‘Okay, whatever,’ but when I went to use the towel, it reeked of mildew. I asked him if he knew what that smell was, and he told me that bath towels just smelled that way. Um, no, sir, not at all.”
—u/andyvhenan
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18.”I saw this with my own eyeballs: My mom would blow her nose into her hand and lick up the snot.”
“I never ate anything she cooked ever again.”
—u/pippintook24
19.”I had a friend who used parent’s nasal spray after said parent had a sinus infection and had been shoving that nozzle in their nostrils to try and ‘help.’ My friend thought this was absolutely fine.”
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“My friend was surprised when they continued to get sinus infections. They would not agree with me that they should stop using the gross nasal spray because that clearly wasn’t related to their sinus infections.”
—u/Odd-Project7935
20.”My brother once had milk in his room that was so old it curdled into cheese, and he ACTUALLY tried to eat a piece. Now, he is no longer allowed to have anything other than water in there because his drinks have spoiled and molded multiple times.”
—u/1zzi__
21.Lastly, “In college, we had an icebreaker round during a required seminar. One girl said that her ‘fun fact’ was that her dad made ‘poop statues.’ The professor made the mistake of asking for clarification, and it got so much worse…”
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“Her parents had been married for 30 years, and they both worked as healthcare providers. Apparently, her dad used to paint with oil recreationally until his daughters were born, when his wife said the paints were too toxic. He was mad but took massive dumps, so he decided to experiment with them and began leaving poop statues on top of the toilet tank. The only rule was that he couldn’t leave them there for more than two days during the summer. She had pictures on her flip phone and offered to pass it around.
When she stopped talking, there was just horrified silence, and we were dismissed early. Fifteen minutes later, I was in the Registrar’s Office changing my major and getting a course transfer.”
—u/janedoe505
Which one of these stories shocked you the most? Has anyone ever admitted a disgusting habit to you? Or perhaps you’d like to get a gross confession off your own chest? Tell us in the comments or answer anonymously using the form below!
Note: Some responses have been edited for length and/or clarity.
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19 Celebs Who Became Famous Much Later In Life
Hollywood stars often find success later in life. Leslie Jones was the oldest person to join Saturday Night Live. Samuel L. Jackson’s profile didn’t increase until he was in his 40s. Steve Carell hit the big time when he starred in The 40-Year-Old Virgin at the age of 40. The Office star Harrison Ford became famous when he was 35. He worked as a carpenter to support himself through his early acting career — until he got his big break as Han Solo in Star Wars at age 35.. Kathy Bates had a successful stage career before she landed her breakout role in the movie Misery at age 34. She is now the highest-paid female actor in the U.S., with a net worth of more than $1.5 billion. She has a daughter, a son and a daughter-in-law who are all in their 20s, 30s and 40s, and a son who is in his early 20s and 30s, respectively.
1.Pedro Pascal
Don Arnold / WireImage, HBO
Pedro Pascal is a hot commodity right now, at 50 years old — but he nearly quit acting multiple times throughout his 20s and 30s. It wasn’t until he landed the role of Oberyn Martell on Game of Thrones when he was in his late 30s that his career really started to take off.
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2.Leslie Jones
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Leslie Jones worked for years to build her stand-up comedy career before she scored a spot on the cast of Saturday Night Live at the age of 47 — becoming the oldest person to join the show as a cast member.
Related: 16 Celebs Who Said “No Thanks” To Hollywood Excess And Chose To Live Below Their Means
3.Morgan Freeman
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It seems like Morgan Freeman has been old his whole career — perhaps because he got his big break at age 50, in the movie Street Smart. Before that, he had primarily worked as a stage actor.
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4.Jane Lynch
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Jane Lynch plugged away in minor roles for years and years in films like The 40-Year-Old Virgin, but only became a household name when she landed her breakthrough role of Sue Sylvester in Glee at the age of 49.
5.Samuel L. Jackson
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Samuel L. Jackson’s roles were mostly small for the first part of his acting career, and his profile didn’t increase until he was in his 40s. While he appeared in Jungle Fever, Jurassic Park and True Romance, it wasn’t until he starred in Pulp Fiction at age 45 that he became a household name.
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6.Alan Rickman
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Alan Rickman was a graphic designer before he decided to pursue acting professionally in his mid-20s. He performed roles in theatre productions and TV for several years, but his breakthrough — and first film — role was as villain Hans Gruber in Die Hard, when he was 42.
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7.Ken Jeong
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Ken Jeong worked as an actual doctor for years, doing bit parts and comedy on the side, when he scored the role of an on-screen doctor in Knocked Up when he was in his late 30s. It was then that he transitioned from medicine to a full-time screen career.
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8.Viola Davis
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Viola Davis had a steady stage career and plenty of minor film and TV roles over the years, but her star really rose when she had a scene-stealing role in the movie Doubt at the age of 43.
9.Steve Carell
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Steve Carell worked steadily in comedy roles — mainly on late night TV — for years, but he hit the big time and became famous in his 40s when he starred in Anchorman, The 40-Year-Old Virgin, and, of course, The Office.
10.Harrison Ford
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Harrison Ford was famously working as a carpenter to support himself through his early acting career — right up until he landed his big break as Han Solo in Star Wars at the age of 35.
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11.Kathy Bates
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While Kathy Bates already had a successful stage career and had had several on-screen roles, it was her breakout role in the movie Misery when she was 42 that really brought her widespread fame.
12.John Mahoney
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John Mahoney worked as a teacher and then an editor of a medical journal before he decided to seriously pursue acting in his late 30s. He found success on stage before scoring some small but memorable TV and movie roles, and then achieving widespread recognition as Martin Crane in Frasier at the age of 53.
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13.Bryan Cranston
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Bryan Cranston steadily built up his acting career over the years, taking on plenty of small roles before landing the leading role of Hal on Malcolm in the Middle when he was in his mid-40s, which really put him on the Hollywood map.
14.Ty Burrell
Araya Doheny / Getty Images, ABC
Another actor made famous in a dad role, Ty Burrell was a largely unkown actor — having had a string of pretty minor roles — prior to being cast as Phil Dunphy on Modern Family, on which he became one of the standout characters. He was in his early 40s at the time.
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15.Octavia Spencer
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In her early career, Octavia Spencer had many minor roles on screen, but when she starred as Minny in The Help she became a household name at the age of 40.
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16.Martha Stewart
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Her name is now synonymous with lifestyle content, but Martha Stewart worked as a stockbroker and then ran a catering company before she published her first cookbook Entertaining at age 41, which launched her lifestyle entertainment empire.
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17.Jon Hamm
Kristina Bumphrey / Variety via Getty Images, AMC
Jon Hamm was struggling so much to make acting work that he nearly quit. Good thing he didn’t, because he finally landed the role that would make his career — the lead, Don Draper in Mad Men — when he was in his mid-30s.
18.Tim Allen
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The dad effect strikes again. Tim Allen had been working primarily in stand-up comedy when he was cast in the lead role in the family sitcom Home Improvement. He was in his late 30s at the time.
19.Bea Arthur
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Bea Arthur achieved a lot of success on stage, but it was her breakthrough role at the age of 49 playing Maude Findlay in All in the Family and its spin-off, centred on her, called Maude , that really made her famous.
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15 Funny Parents Whose Humor Is So Elite, They Immediately Went Viral
These parents’ house features all the jokes. Share something you thought was pretty clever — or eye-roll worthy?! Share the photo in the comments below, and maybe we will make a follow-up post featuring it! Have you as a parent or your own parents done something pretty clever? Share it with us at CNN iReport.com/soulmatestories. Back to the page you came from.
2.This mom who got clever with the jokes:
3.This mom who made this accurate correlation:
4.These parents whose house features ALL the jokes…
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Like this good conversation starter…
This blunt door rug…
And this very peculiar shower curtain:
5.This diabetic mom who labels the Smarties she eats to raise her sugar levels “mom’s meds” so no one else eats them:
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6.These parents who painted the house and did this to their kid’s window:
7.This dad who thought, “no more chopsticks, no problem”…
Kudos, dad:
8.This dad who understood the assignment when he went to Vegas:
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9.This dad who hung this up loud and proud on the dishwasher for his kid:
10.This dad who had an idea and followed through:
11.This boy mom who loves the puns:
12.This dad who made a board of remotes because his kids kept losing them:
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13.This dad who may have done the one thing no daughter wants to see at her proposal:
😳:
14.This dad whose kid had a hurt foot, so they found a way to sprinkle their dad humor in a note to the school:
15.And, lastly, this mom who had to get in the last word:
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Have you as a parent or your own parents done something you thought was pretty clever — or eye-roll worthy?! Share the photo in the comments below, and maybe we will make a follow-up post featuring it!
Fon du Lac Park District gives kids a way to say goodbye to summer
The first-ever Summer and Surf’s Up Foam Fest was held at Veterans Park in East Peoria. The event featured giant inflatables, balloon art, and a large foam party. With the success of the event, it will more than likely become an annual event with the park district. The park district is already getting ready for the next event, which will be focused on introducing kids to the trades.
The first-ever Summer and Surf’s Up Foam Fest, held at Veterans Park in East Peoria, was hosted by the Fon du Lac Park District and featured giant inflatables, balloon art, and a large foam party.
Held from 10 a.m. to 1 p.m. on Aug. 16, the event was free to the public.
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Craig Weigle, director of the Fon du Lac Park District, said around a thousand attendees came to the inaugural foam fest event. With the success of the event, it will more than likely become an annual event with the park district.
“I have a feeling this is going to be every year. I think it’s even going to grow as the word gets out. We put it on our Facebook page and just had an overwhelming response,” he said.
Weigle said that the park district is already getting ready for the next event in September at Veterans Park, which will be focused on introducing kids to the trades.
“So the Trucks and Trades, we’ve reached out to a lot of local construction companies and even schools, so they can bring out their equipment and kind of show kids what the trades are all about. And then we have Movie in the Park that we’re going to show up in this park as well,” he said.
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For more future events held by the park district, you can visit their Facebook page.
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15 Funny, Wholesome, And Absolutely Adorable Posts From This Week That Honestly Kinda Restored My Faith In Humanity
The internet is really good at showing me the things that stress me out. So, I decided to round up some of the most wholesome posts I found this week. While we can’t endorse what X has become, we can bring you the worthwhile moments that still exist there, curated and free of the surrounding chaos. Feel free to tell me what you think down below. And if you enjoyed these posts, be sure to go ahead and follow their creators; I think we’re all in need of a little more wholesome content. Also in Internet Finds: “He Would Squeeze People’s Hands When He Shook Them”: 26 Incredibly Chilling Stories From People Who Knew Murderers.
Editor’s note: While we can’t endorse what X has become, we can bring you the worthwhile moments that still exist there, curated and free of the surrounding chaos.
1.This unexpected surprise:
2.This person’s date:
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3.Getting into niche local hobbies:
4.This person’s joy at finding a cool mouse buckle:
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5.This parent-child moment:
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6.Having fun reorganizing the bookshelf:
7.This, because reading a book at the beach is always a healing experience:
8.This cat and his owner:
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9.This person’s extremely relatable child:
10.This:
11.This cat with a climbing wall:
12.This kid who made me laugh:
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13.This dream:
14.This greedy little cat:
15.And finally, thie AMC employee who sounds like such a sweetheart:
I hope you loved these as much as I did! Feel free to tell me what you think down below. And if you enjoyed these posts, be sure to go ahead and follow their creators; I think we’re all in need of a little more wholesome content. ❤️
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