A single phrase can add years to your image—even if your sneakers say otherwise.

Crafting a positive, forward-looking image isn’t just a fashion choice or a profile-pic update.

It’s in the words we drop at the coffee shop, the sidelines, or that Zoom happy hour with younger coworkers.

If you’ve crossed the 55-year mark, you’ve probably earned a lifetime of stories—but a handful of everyday phrases can signal “out-of-touch” faster than any gray hair ever could.

Let’s talk through six of the sneakiest offenders and what to say instead.

1. Back in my day

I get the impulse. Something in the news sets off a memory and suddenly I’m comparing vinyl prices in ’89 to streaming fees now.

The problem? It transports the conversation straight into nostalgia-only territory, shutting down whatever’s unfolding right now. Younger friends tune out because they weren’t there; peers roll their eyes because they were.

Try this swap: “I remember when we used to… How are people handling it today?” You keep the story but invite an update—instantly more engaging.

As Yale researcher Dr. Becca Levy puts it, *“Culture-based negative age stereotypes adversely impact a wide array of health conditions.”

When we cling to past-tense talk, we reinforce those stereotypes for ourselves and everyone listening.

2. Kids these days

A universal conversation killer. It lumps an entire generation into one caricature and paints you as the critic on the porch.

I’ve mentioned this before but broad-brushing any group is lazy thinking—and it backfires. The moment you utter those three words, younger colleagues brace for judgment instead of dialogue.

Flip it by spotlighting specifics and curiosity: “TikTok seems wild compared with early YouTube. What do you enjoy about creating short videos?”

You move from scolding to learning mode—way more youthful.

3. I’m too old

Whether it’s pickleball, coding basics, or vegan sushi, declaring yourself “too old” slams the door on potential.

Personal anecdote: last year I joined a photography workshop filled with twenty-somethings experimenting with mirrorless cameras.

I was convinced my DSLR was a fossil—and so was I. Two sessions in, it hit me that everyone around me cared far less about my birth year than the shots I was taking.

Age limits often exist only in our heads. Stanford longevity expert Laura Carstensen reminds us, *“We have 30 extra years. The real question is how we’ll use them.”*² Let that sink in next time you feel an age ceiling pressing down.

Replace “I’m too old” with “I’ve never tried that—yet.” One word, massive mindset shift.

4. Technology is too complicated

I hear this a lot when someone hands me their phone with the flashlight stuck on. Tech frustration is real, but broadcasting it reads as “I’ve given up.”

Instead, narrate your learning curve: “I haven’t cracked this app—any tips?”

See the difference? You’re still acknowledging the struggle, but you’re signaling willingness to learn. That willingness is magnetic; people love teaching what they know.

Fun fact: during lockdown I forced myself to edit videos in DaVinci Resolve.

Forty YouTube tutorials later, I’m no Spielberg, but my travel clips have background music that actually lines up with the cuts. Progress, not perfection.

5. At my age you slow down

Bodies do change, no denying that. But announcing universal slowdown plants the idea that decline is inevitable—and research shows belief often drives outcome.

Levy’s studies found that people with positive age beliefs live 7.5 years longer on average than those with negative ones. That stat alone nudged me into riding my bike again after a decade hiatus.

Try reframing: “I pay closer attention to recovery these days.” It acknowledges reality without surrendering momentum.

A tip from endurance coach friends: add “yet” whenever you’re tempted to list new limitations. “I can’t run 5 k without walking—yet.” The tiny tag keeps possibility alive.

6. That’s how we’ve always done it

When this line shows up in a meeting, innovation packs up and leaves the room.

Language guru Deborah Tannen nails it: *“The words we choose matter because they shape the ways we understand each other.”*³ Locking into past-tense procedures tells teammates their ideas aren’t welcome.

A healthier pivot: “Here’s our current process—what could make it better?” You honor history and open the door at the same time.

I borrowed this phrasing while consulting for a nonprofit last spring. One volunteer suggested converting their massive PDF handbook into bite-size Loom videos.

The idea would’ve died under a “we’ve always” mindset; instead, their onboarding time dropped from two weeks to two hours.

Wrapping it up

Small phrases carry huge weight.

Swap the six above for language that invites curiosity, possibility, and collaboration, and you’ll project energy that feels decades younger—no new wardrobe required.

Words are free updates. Install a few today and see who leans in tomorrow.